Business Relationships Are Different
There are two words that describe the difference between business and personal relationships - context and depth.
Context is obvious. A business relationship is wrapped up in the motivations, desires, and goals of business. You want a customer to buy from you. A customer wants maximum value. An employee wants respect, to be heard, and opportunity. An employer wants good production, showing up on time, and respect for others and the organization.
Within this context one attempts to form connections and relationships that further business goals, ideally for both parties.
Personal relationships are based on a desire to connect with someone. We choose our personal relationships, except in the instance of family. Family connections are built in; we have these relationships, regardless of our desires.
Depth is a reflection of the strength and measure of a relationship. The stronger the connection and bond with someone, the deeper the relationship. Deep relationships facilitate (and are facilitated by) sharing of personal goals, wishes and dreams. Individuals are much more open with their feelings, and are much more vulnerable because of it.
Because of business context, business relationships tend not to be as deep as personal relationships. That does not mean business relationships cannot be strong relationships.
Remember the phrase “people do business with people they know, like and trust”. To know someone, to like someone, and then to trust someone is a progression. It takes time. Each party knows when they first meet that the meeting is tied to business.
The best approach to a business relationship is to focus first on the relationship. Build connections and trust before attempting to transact business.
To illustrate why a relationship-first strategy is best, think about a typical business-to-business sales situation. You are meeting with a senior level executive about your proposal. There are almost always 4 questions that need to be answered. They are:
How does your product work?
What are the benefits?
What’s the ROI and/or business case for me to buy this product?
Why should I trust you?
Most good salespeople approach the four questions in the order given above. If you’ve sat through a power point presentation from a vendor, you know this to be true. The story goes something like this:
“Here’s our product, how it works, what we do to support it.
If you buy this product, here are the benefits you’ll receive.
Not only will you benefit from an operational, marketing, sales, HR, etc. perspective, but there is a great payback on our product. Here’s the financial case.
Last but not least, let our customers speak for us. Here’s what some of them have to say. We’re a great company; you can trust us to deliver on our promises.”
Curiously, the decision maker, the C-Level Executive, asks the same four questions, but looks at them in exactly the reverse order.
“Why should I trust you?” is first and foremost. Without that, everything else does not matter. Then, “If I trust you, prove the case and show me how.”
The decision maker’s perspective puts the relationship at the top of the food chain. How I relate to you, how we relate to each other, can I trust you; this is the #1 priority.
Also, the relationship and trust a customer has with you vs. your competitor is the greatest influencer on decisions. This is especially true when solutions are not equal.
Did you ever lose a deal when you knew your solution was the better answer for the customer? And the customer even admitted it. The probable factor that swayed the decision was the difference in the relationship your customer had with you vs. the relationship they had with your competitor.
Which brings us to the #1 reason to focus on relationships first. Strong relationships are the ultimate differentiator. Competitors can copy products and services. However, a relationship can never be duplicated because no two people are the same.
The Bottom Line - if you focus on the relationship first you answer the most important question before it is even asked - “Why should I trust you?”